Camellia-Berry Grass’s Hall of Waters

Elizabeth Deanna Morris Lakes

About six months ago, right before everything really shut down, my kid found my copy of Camellia-Berry Grass’s Hall of Waters, which I had just had Grass sign. He became fixated on it. He liked the cover, liked the author photo in the back, but most of all liked saying Berry Grass’s name. “Berry Grass,” he’d say, “Blueberry Grass, Blue Grass, Berry Trees, Berry Leaves!”

            My kid is right to push and pull at Camellia-Berry Grass’s name like this. Grass loves puns, which one can see on their Twitter, but they also like taking one thing and pushing and pulling it, twisting it, lighting it up from unexpected angles. Hall of Waters does just this. It’s a book of essays, but just from its heft, you might guess poetry. I do not say this to say, “Oh, they’re essays but really they’re poetry.” What I mean is: Grass takes a form and transforms it. Many of the essays in their book are only one page, but those pages demand you sit with each sentence, one at a time.

            Take, for example, the book’s opening essay, “Accountability,” which begins, “Let’s get to the point, like water does, rushing to fill all the spaces: this is about liquidity.” The essay takes up half of one page, but each line—dare I say—holds its own water. They ask us to consider spaces empty and filled, places occupied and not.

            The essays are looking at Grass’s hometown, Excelsior Springs, how the town loved to erase Indigenous people and Black people from its history, how Grass’s personal history was written there, and how the water in the springs was the town’s greatest selling point and greatest lie. The essays are unflinching in how they are both critical and empathetic to the town and the townspeople, both pointing out the cracks in each story the town tells while also explaining how the cracks got there.

            The book’s essays continue to think about space, not just within words, but with how they themselves take up space. Look at “The World Reduced to One Truth, Science, Such as It Is,” a letter to Donald Judd, an artist from Excelsior Springs that, as Grass writes in an earlier essay, “nobody really speaks of” in Excelsior. “Maybe it’s because you got out,” Grass wonders to Judd. In “The World,” the essay starts like a letter, directly addressing Judd, who died in 1994. But the main body of the essay reads like a poetic litany, each sentence a new line, defining “good art.” By the end, Grass pivots back to Judd, asking a series of questions about the way he made his art. Judd’s art reflects onto Grass, and the water of their words reflects back.

            In “True or False,” Grass arranges quotes about the springwater across the page like their own tiny stanzas. They don’t provide any more analysis at this point. Instead, each quote hangs like a water droplet at the end of a branch, and the reader must decide if it will continue to cling or fall.

            But best of all, one of my favorite things in this book, the thing I always mention to people, is Grass’s “hermit crab essays,” a term coined by Brenda Miller that describes essays that use borrowed, non-literary forms. These essays use a literal form: the Architectural/History Inventory Form from the Missouri Department of Natural Resources State Historic Preservation Office. Grass fills these forms out for their own childhood home, for example. Boxes are checked, and answers written briefly in the small space the box allows (“31. Chimney placement: Offset left”), but Grass also answers the questions in the dream state an essay allows (“11a. Historic use (if known): Horror and refuge. It was wet with booze breath & then verdant with rootgrowth. Less desperate than it was. Decorated.”) These hermit crab essays are thrilling: they let Grass press the mundane right up against trauma and love. They move the reader procedurally through a process of grief in the way that many of us must move through grief, at least initially—by having to fill out paperwork. And then, in the “cont.” sections of some questions, the essay floods the page, filling in the gaps the best that Grass can.

            Hall of Waters is both a book I could never write and the book I wish I could have written. It proves that one might not require much physical space to intensely investigate a place and a history. Each small essay—each sentence—creates a swell inside you; until at some point, you burst.


Elizabeth Deanna Morris Lakes was born in Harrisburg, PA and has a BA in Creative Writing from Susquehanna University and an MFA from George Mason University. Her book, Ashley Sugarnotch & the Wolf, is out from Mason Jar Press. She has appeared in Always Crashing, The Rumpus, Cartridge Lit, Crab Fat Magazine, and SmokeLong Quarterly. She is the blog editor of The Rupture. She is one of two buds on The Smug Buds podcast.

The Light the Light the Light the Light (One + Two)

Margaret Yapp


The Light the Light the Light the Light (One)

I’m trying to pray to
god so I can stop thinking about
god & about the first uncut dick


I ever saw & tenderness & about how
horny I am & how tenderness
doesn’t matter today & won’t matter tomorrow.


I got a nosebleed during sex with a new lover.
The world’s literally on fire & we were born
into the middle. The middle of


the light. I’m sorry
for talking about birth & sorry
for talking about sex. I’m distracted &


busy & waiting for a text back. The new lover
made me squirt & then I cried
about my dad … what does abject mean?


I’m an animal in my middle.
I’m an animal digging against my middle.
Tenderness doesn’t matter only coincidence.


I don’t have time to pray. I’m busy
sending nudes to my entire contact list. I have an iPhone 6S
& I’m covered in bruises.


I want to tell you I’m kinky but I’m only anemic
& we can only witness from far away: the light


The Light the Light the Light the Light (Two)

I don’t know how to start a fire.
I only know why one might end.
Sex is only a small death


if you actually come.
I’m addicted to wondering
about my unconscious & I continue


& continue to try to find the light.
I pray to god for the light.
There is no reliable


name for any of this & we have established language
is impossible. I pray to
god my new antidepressant


makes me less horny. Am I in love
or am I just smoking weed every night?
Am I in love or am I


eating a particularly good orange? No matter
how fast we burn
I wouldn’t want to be


caught dead in the middle of a war
alone like this.
From here on out I promise


I’m only going
to let hot people hurt my feelings.


Margaret Yapp is from Iowa City, Iowa. Her poems and essays have appeared in Peach Mag, Apartment Poetry, The Minnesota Review, and elsewhere. Margaret is an MFA candidate at the Iowa Writers’ Workshop. Find her on the internet @bigbabymarg.

Infrared

David M. Sheridan

On this fall day in Michigan, we all gather on the screened-in porch, protected
from the cold by a technologically advanced heater hung from the ceiling.
Our host explains that this space-age device generates infrared light:
“It heats objects, not the air.” At first this seems like a routine piece


of information, akin to “these muffins are sweetened with beet juice”
or “these heirloom apples are locally grown.” We raise our palms,
immersing them in the infrabeam. As promised, our skin registers warmth.
But then we try to feel the air, to learn whether it is being heated as well.


How can we tell? “It heats objects, not the air.”
Why should we care? But we do,
and wave our hands ridiculously, a vain attempt to verify
that the in-between space remains untroubled. There is no knowing


if the air is warm or if our skin is cooking via direct communication with the invisibly glowing
bulb — redder than red, or perhaps nascently red, a hue en route to obtaining true
status as a recognized color. Suddenly, the heater seems to call into question
our understanding of space itself as an everyday medium. What would it mean


for heat to be transmitted to our hands without affecting the space between,
like a sailboat that doesn’t touch the wind? Even fish, so slippery,
must create a little disturbance as their fins cut through the water.
Infrared: that category of light that allows Navy SEALS to see at night,


positioned at the spectrum’s edge, opposite ultraviolet.
“The rainbow is so much thicker than it looks,” someone quips.
Infrastructure provides a matrix of support at the bottom of our lives,
blindly shaping our momentary existence. An infralapsarian


is someone who believes Adam’s lapse lies beneath our sinful nature.
Infradian (rhymes with circadian) refers to cycles that extend beyond
a single day, that spill, like the enjambed
lines of poems, past the borders of the presumptive unit.


The world is full of infra-:
Infralanguages, composed of infrawords, allow us
to convey the infrareal.
In fact, this poem is only the shiny surface


of an infratext, a better poem that lies beneath/beside/beyond this
one, if only you could sense the sense
radiating infrareadly from the page. But that would be an infraction
against the laws of optics or semiotics


or leprechauns. Don’t ask how it works.
Be content to let it heat your hands as you hold it,
carefully, like you would hold a hot piece of aluminum foil
when you retrieve a slice of warmed-over pizza from the oven —


fingers pinching the edges, touching
as little as possible, so as not to get burned.


David M. Sheridan teaches writing and design in the Residential College in the Arts and Humanities program at Michigan State University. He holds an MFA from Western Michigan University. His poems, essays, and stories have appeared in Michigan Quarterly Review, Columbia Poetry Review, Beloit Poetry Journal, Parting Gifts, and other places. He is working on a collection of poetry entitled 52 Missing Poems, in which every poem is cut out of a black 3″x5″ card.

The Butterfly House + Climate Change

Adam-Scheffler


The Butterfly House

For a full month
once each year,
cops, skin cancer doctors,
and TSA agents
should be made to work
security at the insect
house of the Miami
botanical gardens,
and, positioned in the
airlock security room
between the green house
& egress, should
have to pat people
down impersonally,
extending
flat fingers, careful
not to harm the
secret beauty each
body might hold.


Climate Change

Today, I’m going to
try to impersonate an
alarm clock that others
won’t want to punch,
someone who doesn’t
get hysterical over a
headline about Miami beach
going underwater and the net
sexiness of Florida flocking
inland, or LA cosplaying
as a birthday candle,
but that also doesn’t
gaslight himself like
an old timey-miner,
moving deeper into the
darkness, with his tiny
flickering flame, so
obsessed with
admiring the lovely
berry-scrawled paintings
of bison & deer, that he
stands there doing nothing
until the light goes out.


Adam Scheffler grew up in California, received his MFA in poetry from the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, and his PhD in English from Harvard. His first book of poems—A Dog’s Life—was the winner of the 2016 Jacar Press Book Contest. His poems have appeared in The Yale Review, The Common, The American Poetry Review, The Cincinnati Review, Rattle, Plume, Barrow Street, Antioch Review, Sewanee Review, Verse Daily, Academy of American Poets Poem-a-Day, and many other venues. He teaches in the Harvard College Writing Program.

This is the Light

Carl Phillips

            This is the deep light you’ve waited for, unfiltered except
now and then by the memory of your first time seeing it,
soon the night-dark after that, filling with sounds that were
strange only from your own mixed perspective as the latest
stranger to have passed through by accident, if there’s such
            a thing. Now you live here, where it’s likeliest you’ll die, too,
you’re finally old enough, not just to say, but – without
sorrow or fear, most of the time – understand the truth of it,
the mind done with signaling, letting its watch-fires, one by one,
go out: the renegade glamour of late fall, owl-ish, fox-ish, how
            brightness is and isn’t a color exactly, the one tree from a
city years ago, its weeping branches of pink-white poisonous
berries, like a vow against winter, against giving in, or as if
            the tree, to cover its nakedness, had chosen a stole of what –
when looked at closely – seem the shrunken heads of goblins
in miniature – from afar, just berries, more proof that victory
wears best when worn quietly, or it never happened, or to
someone else, I’m only trying to help you, let me help you,
            he said, something like that, unbuckling; they sailed for hours;
the water that day was as close to perfect as perfect gets here.


Carl Phillips‘s most recent book of poems is Pale Colors in a Tall Field (FSG, 2020). He teaches at Washington University in St. Louis.

A Habit from Tikrit + Fleeing Never-Pleasure Island

Gordon Kippola


A Habit from Tikrit

My war was softer than the infantry’s,
but patriotic terrorists fired rockets
at our FOB most days. Insurgent assholes
would have blown my limbs off happily,
or sent my now-ex-wife a jigsaw pile.
Within a month I think, fuck the dead
hadjis in all their meaningless numbers.


Two-thousand and four, in northern Iraq,
ten-dozen Big Red One soldiers are killed,
including a few prescient suicides.
I salute the dog-tags, boots and helmets
of new-slain kids, times six. Fifteen years—
I thought by now, for sure, I’d care again
when human beings die. Turns out I can’t.


Fleeing Never-Pleasure Island

No matter where I’m living at the time—Texas
New York, Iraq—when I walk beside the road,
the same boy screams at me from passing cars.


Who and what are you, boy? Why do you shout
from yellow Hyundais, rusting Dodge Chargers,
boxy Audi Foxes: all these identical stealthy cars


your faceless buddies drive? Do you shadow me
because I’m lost? Has a life of criminal intent
put you on my tail? Maybe you’re not my Javert,


a vengeful ghost, or Satan come to claim my soul.
Maybe you’re Peter Pan, reminding me to crow;
or Jiminy Cricket, helping me become


a real boy. Doppler effect shrieks hammer me
into flight or fight. My knees are too creaky
to run from teenagers in cars. I never learned


to fight, but I was large enough an animal
to give attackers pause. Age fragiles my bones,
robs my muscle mass: age has made me prey.


I wrap a paring knife inside a paper towel
and hide it in my pocket while I walk.



Following a career as a US Army musician, Gordon Kippola earned an MFA in Creative Writing at the University of Tampa, and calls Bremerton, Washington home. He serves as a reader for The Los Angeles Review. His poetry has appeared in District Lit, The Road Not Taken, The Main Street Rag, Slant: A Journal of Poetry, Southeast Missouri State University Press, and other splendid publications. One of his poems was selected for the World Enough Writers Coffee Poems Anthology, one was a 2020 Rattle Poetry Prize finalist.